The last month has been an incredible whirlwind in my life.
Let me share just a few highlights:
- My youngest child finished elementary school and
is now a middle schooler.
- My middle schooler is now in high school.
- My 17 year old attended prom, planned her
graduation party, and made some incredibly mature and clear-minded
decisions…all with a severe concussion.
- My 19 year old finished his first year of
college and drove through 11 states to come visit me.
- My 21-year-old daughter shipped off for Air
Force basic training.
- My 22 year old relocated with her husband,
interviewed, and was hired to work/train with a nationally acclaimed chef.
- My 25 year old and his wife quietly dealt with
their first Mother’s Day since the death of their baby daughter.
- My 26 year old spent a week ministering to
someone with an aching heart, causing her heart to ache, as well.
Add to the above the fact that my husband was in South
Africa and I was sharing our happenings here with him through FaceTime, and you
have the formula for a crazy month. Sometimes I feel as though I’m the eye of
the hurricane around here, keeping everyone from flying off into space! Being
the eye of the hurricane is tiring work!
Ever have one of these months? So many of our circumstances
this past month held such possibility for turmoil and confusion. Sometimes,
that’s what mothering feels like to me…more questions than answers, and
constant change that keeps me off-kilter. So, what’s a mother to do? As I
pondered this question, the Lord brought a couple of points from one of my
husband’s sermons to mind. May I share these points with you, in hope that the
biblical truths that calm and quiet my heart can minister to your hearts, as
The first truth is this: God knows stuff I don’t know. So
simple really, but truly profound. You see; I would love to orchestrate ever
minute, day, and circumstance that comes into my children’s lives. I have a
plan and I’m sure that my plan is perfect to fit their every need. Here’s the
problem. I’m not God! He knows whom they’ll meet. He knows where they will go.
He knows what they need. And, most importantly, He knows how to perfectly
orchestrate the situations and circumstances that will most beautifully develop
them into vessels suitable for His use. For a mom who likes to plan and (let’s
be honest) control every situation, this is a hard truth for me to swallow.
However, when I take my fingers off the steering wheel and step back to allow
God full access to my children, I see Him do things that my meager attempts
could never produce. I see Him soften hearts, develop conviction, and change
faulty thought processes. God is God and He alone knows exactly what each child
needs to be conformed to His image. Truthfully, God is God and He alone knows
what I need to be conformed to His image, as well.
Here’s the second truth. God’s ways are higher than my ways.
Sometimes my goals and dreams for my children are so shortsighted. I want great
things for them, but God wants even greater! I see with earthly and temporal
eyes; He sees with eternity in mind. Oh how I long to incorporate this truth in
my life! When the immediate seems so important and sometimes dangerous, I need
to learn to entrust my children to God’s eternal purposes. My meddling and
protection are sometimes the very things that keep them from internalizing God’s
greater lessons in their lives. Instead of accomplishing good, I become a
stumbling block, keeping them from God’s best. My dreams are limiting, God’s
plans are limitless. As I’m learning this truth, I’m seeing God accomplish
things through my children that I could never have imagined for them. I’m
realizing how small my goals and dreams for my children are in light of the
great God they serve.
What concerns for your kids weigh heavy on your heart,
today? We’re moms! Sometimes I think we believe it’s our job to worry, but
nothing could be further from the truth. We serve a great God and He has great
plans for our kids. Will you join me in remembering that He knows stuff we
don’t know and He knows that “stuff” is just what our kids need? And, can you
trust that His ways are higher, better, and more glorious than we can ever
imagine? Crazy days will come and go, but our God has it all under control. I
don’t know about you, but that’s a relief to me!
Thank you Megan for the reminder. It has been one of those months for us as well. I need to remember He loves them even more than I do.
Yes. Some wise women shared with me recently how reacting and acting according the voice of others in my head is a stumbling block. Instead I should act as God directs. Thank you. 🙂 I also have been impressed this month that my kids are not mine to make into adults, but God’s. He has them in mind better than I do. He knows where they belong, whom they belong with, and how it’s all going to happen…as impossible as it seems in my finite understanding.
Thank you for this message. I needed to hear it today! Your emails have been such a blessing to me. Each day I look forward to reading how I can help my children develop Godly character in their lives. I am thankful that God is in control and has plans far greater for my children than I do!
I do have a question for you though. My oldest son has had a hard time making friends. He’s seven years old, so I know he’s just beginning to learn. But I can visually see the desire of his heart when we are with other children, and my heart aches for him. I had a hard time when I was younger also. I’ve been praying that God would send a friend for him. Do you have any suggestions? Thanks for your ministry!
Thanks for your comments, ladies.
Heather: Let me encourage you! Your son is still very young. At 7 years old, I would say that you should be teaching him how to be a good friend. A child who is others-oriented and equipped to show friendship to others will soon have friends of his own. Teach him how to serve others, listen carefully to others, and reach out to those who are not fitting into the group. Teach him to pray for the other children. Although it’s fine to pray that God would send him a friend, I think it’s equally important to teach him to pray for a heart that is content and intentional in caring for others. Be careful that your concern for him doesn’t cause him to be overly concerned for himself!