Taming the Mama Bear

I’m finding myself in Mama Bear mode today…


Have you ever been there?

A big kid bullies your toddler. The Captain never chooses your son for kickball. Someone calls your pre-teen ugly. Mean girls gossip about your daughter. Or, your teen suffers a broken heart.

I don’t know about you, but I just want to get in there and fight their battle for them!

I want to punish the wrongdoer.

Avenge the insult.

Make right what’s wrong.

I can think some fairly uncharitable and unsanctified thoughts at those times!

All those feelings are so normal…

So natural…

So completely unbiblical!

How in the world am I going to teach my children to “Love their enemies and do good to those who hate them,” ( Luke 6:27) when I turn into a foaming mouth, claws raised, raging mama bear at the first sign of injustice?

So, today I’m back to square one. I’m taking thoughts captive and reminding myself that even in the weediest situations… there is beauty to be found and ministry to be performed.

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Can I share some Square One, Cool Your Jets, and Put Away Your Mama Bear Claws truths I’ve been remembering this morning 

There’s always more than one side of the story! Yes, my child can seem so very right in the heat of the moment, but more often than not, when I sort through the facts, my child played some part, albeit small, in the drama of the moment. Remembering this one keeps me from mortifying moments later!

There are lessons to be learned in hurt feelings, wounded pride, and broken relationships. Although I hate it, especially for my children, pain is good. Pain is a gift, divinely appointed by God, to draw our eyes, ears, and hearts closer to Him. Taking away the pain simply robs my children of the opportunity to learn the lesson now… instead of later. And believe me, these are lessons they will have to learn; better sooner, than later!

Even the offender is precious to God. I’ve learned this truth over and over… We never know what is going on in someone else’s life. Some of the most hurtful people I have known are hurtful simply because they have been hurt by others. Teaching our children, (and forcing ourselves,) to reach out in compassion, tenderness, and forgiveness will open doors of reconciliation, restoration, and renewed relationship.

Firmly placing my children and their friends before the throne of God in prayer will accomplish far more than my feeble words or actions could ever produce. When I want to speak out… I must instead pray up!

Finally, and probably most importantly, I must purposefully choose to let the issue belong to my child. Their Problem Is Not Mine To Fix! When I become a hovering helicopter parent, clearing their path from all sticky situations, conflict, and pain, I become a part of the problem, instead of a counselor of peace. I rob them of the chance to learn vital character qualities like compassion, patience, long-suffering, forgiveness, and the list goes on and on.

Life’s hard.

As we sinners co-exist with all of our sinful friends and sinful family, we’re going to have times of pain, heartache and tears. But, instead of using those times to claw our way to a get-even with them resolution, may we, as mamas and sisters in Christ, graciously point the way to Jesus. And then, conflict will become reconciliation… brokenness will become restoration… and separation will become renewed relationship… All to the glory of God!